Tag Archives: parody

The dialog I wish I could include

This will post on Friday, but it was written on Thursday. We intend to go looking for a camp sight and hopefully find something.

Word count has been in the hundreds. This is mostly because of other things going on, and familial distractions. If I get to wake up early in the National Forest, the sky’s the limit.

Thursday is also Lisa Burton Radio, and I don’t want to step on my guest’s toes.

This is a bit I’d like to include in Voyage of the Lanternfish. I can’t, because of Copyright and such. However, it’s free to read this blog, and I’ll call it a parody which is also allowed.

To understand it, you need to know James is the Captain of the ship. Dan is his first officer. Trouble is one of the root monsters.


Dan and the monsters came down the dock. With full darkness, there was little chance of anyone seeing the tiny creatures in his wake. Trouble jumped and flipped as he walked.

“What’s with him?” James asked.

“Up town. Everybody was doing that Kung fu fightin.”

“Ya ya,” Trouble said. He jumped around in a circle. ” Psh-psh-psh. Kicks fast. Like lightning.”

“I thought the whole thing was a little bit frightening, if you ask me,” Dan said.


For those of you who are too young to get the reference, here is a video.

I’m looking forward to some fresh air, some peaceful writing time, and great camping food. There is even a brewery about thirty miles from where I intend to go.

Hope all of you are having a good Friday, and if I find a signal of some kind, I’ll try to update. If not, assume I’m having a great time.


Filed under Writing

I’m still not a poet

It’s Christmas tomorrow. I’ve heard the songs of the season for two months now. It occurred to me that nobody ever made a parody Christmas song. There might be one somewhere, but I can’t think of it.

Wednesday is one of my regular posting days, so I made you a Christmas parody. I spent fifteen whole minutes on this, because I’m dedicated like that.

(With apologies to Keith, Mick, Santa, and … well, the whole world really.)

Santa’s Little Helper

What a drag it is without snow

“Kids are different today”

I just heard old Santa say

Santa needs something to help him through his day

And though he’s not really ill

There’s a little chocolate pill

He goes running for the shelter of a Santa’s little helper

And it helps him now and then, just a couple M & Ms

“Kids are different today”

I just heard old Santa say

Hitching reindeer to a sled is just a drag

So he pops an M &M and a Mars Bar is his friend

And goes running for the shelter of a Santa’s little helper

Two more help him on his way, get him through his busy day

Outside the shop, he drank a pop

“Kids just aren’t the same today”

I just heard old Santa say

They want iPhones by the ton and X-Box too

They’re so tough to satisfy, but with sugar you can try

So go running for the shelter of your Santa’s little helper

Egg Nog helps him get it right, helps him through this Silent Night

Please, oh please, some Jujubes

Cookies and tea, at number three

What a drag this is without snow

“Christmas is too hard today”

I just heard old Santa say

These kids really need some stockings full of coal

And if you drink one more Coke, you will give yourself a stroke

No more running for the shelter of your Santa’s little helper

And he works on through the night, makes his list and checks it twice


Filed under Uncategorized