Word count and future ideas

I closed my iPad, then leaned back in my lounge chair. “That’s a wrap for today, folks.”

Lisa Burton, my robot assistant picked the twin ponytails from her hair. “Back to more Cicis tomorrow?”

“Probably.”

“You really need to get these girls some better clothes.”

“I did, but they tend to wear jumpsuits while they’re on the ship. We’re deep into the mission right now.”

Percy, the Space Chimp, perked up. “Not bad, dude. I’m finally in the shuttle and weapons are hot. I’m expecting to kick some major ass tomorrow.”

“Me, too. We’re nearly finished. You have two adventures left in this book and I should easily break eighty-thousand words.”

“Could be a lot bigger for science fiction.”

“True, but in this era people seem to like something shorter if it isn’t going to wrap in one book.”

“And we have three coming.”

“We’ll see. My first trilogy was popular until the final volume. Nobody wanted root monsters and Kung Fu after book two.”

He bolted upright on the couch. “Dude, don’t do that to me. I planned on three volumes.”

“That’s still the goal, but I might not release any of them until they’re completely finished. A tighter release schedule might help. It was a good day at 2800 words.”

“And, tomorrow we’re blowing the crap out of things?”

“That’s the plan. I gotta tell you, I’m thinking about starting something different.”

“Don’t do that. We’ve got what it takes.”

“I think so, too. I can always start another hat story. You were backup, then moved into primary position. I feel the need for a new secondary story. There are some stand alone ones I could write. There’s the revenge story that takes place in a post-apocalyptic swamp. One that’s an African adventure that still needs some black magic ideas. I even have one about Dash Goodman going on his quest to become a full member of the coven. It will involve a Native American girl and some of her lore, a stolen PBY floatplane, and summoning a fun familiar for him that I dreamed up.”

“Nobody wants to read that crap. A talking Space Chimp with a Human girlfriend working as a spy is what they want.”

“Relax. I still need Dash to be an apprentice for a few more years. What do you think about Dash Goodman & the Last of the Lava Men, or Mud Men, or something?”

“I think it sounds stupid. I could steal a ship and save you from writing it. Show you some real adventure, too.”

“There’s also the Detroit story. Tons of abandoned homes and two kids playing Indianna Jones stumble across something more serious.”

“We could go back to the fleet graveyard and find some antiquated garbage, too.”

“Calm down. We’ll work together tomorrow. Dash Goodman needs a serious outline to chase a McGuffin, and so does the Detroit thingie.

“I won’t let you down. I promise.”

“I wonder how I’d look as an Indian Princess?” Lisa asked.

“Probably too blonde, and it’s going to be a modern setting. She’s Salish, so I’d need to do some research before I could start. Feels like something two or three years down the line.”

“Will we be done by then?” Percy asked.

“I think so. I still have to weave other things into my schedule. Sometimes I work better with a side project. I’m just warning you it could happen.”

“Good talk, but let’s see where tomorrow takes us. Maybe you’ll get so fired up you don’t want a side story.”

“Maybe, but I wouldn’t count on it.”

Something new to share

The word metrics aren’t that impressive today. It came across at a little over 1900 words. Let’s face it, those 5000 word days don’t happen very often.

I’m mostly posting to share some new artwork. I’ve threatened to have Sean Harrington prepare some artwork for the Research Sirens for a long time. They seem to show up at the writing cabin frequently, so I’m going to use the group poster today. He actually sent each one individually as well if I ever want to use them.

***

I got to the writing cabin early this morning. Temperatures have gotten into the seventies recently, but at 5:30 it’s still pretty cold. Percy the Space Chimp was asleep on the couch, so I had coffee in the kitchen with Lisa Burton my PA and robot girl.

“People loved the poster of my tagger girl over at John Howell’s place this week,” she said.

“See, I thought it was a poster of Hellpox.”

“Let’s face it. I’m the spokesmodel, and it’s always about me to a degree. Besides, readers love my shining personality.”

“That’s true, you always seem to make more sales than I do on these tours.”

“Good to know with my performance review looming.”

Percy wobbled in still wearing his flight suit. “Are we finally going to work on something today?” He poured himself a steaming cup.

“Yeah, but these are hard sections for me. I have to deal with the fall out from your relationship with Buffer, then set up some character growth for you.”

“That’s all crap. Plop me in a star fighter and let’s blow some shit up. Readers like that.”

“They do, but they also like to see you change over the course of the story. You’re defensive about people’s prejudices toward Space Chimps, but you have your own prejudices as well.”

“That’s what makes me charming. Isn’t it enough that you ratted me and Buffer out? Can’t you leave me something of myself?”

“The goal is to have you become a better person amid all the spying and warfare around you. I’m also about to reveal a cool plot twist involving your favorite comic, Agent Golden Gibbon. I just need to decide how the real world part of that is going to come across, then save some for the second book. The guy’s going to need a name, and a description and I have to look some of that up.” We all headed for the writing office.

I froze at the sight. My office had been invaded by the Research Sirens.

“You really shouldn’t make a move without digging into your new character a bit.” Libraria dropped her book bag on my desk then parked herself in my lounge chair.

“Ugh! Not these chicks again,” Percy moaned.

Wiki patted the side of her beanbag, wrinkling her nose at him in a kind of smile.

“I don’t think Buffer would approve.” He sat beside her anyway.

Conversia guided me to the couch, then sat uncomfortably close. “What kind of character do you have in mind?”

“I’m thinking he’ll use a pen name for his comic, because he’s kind of a spy. I want that to reflect in the name he uses.”

Wiki typed away at her iPad mini. “Thesaurus indicates something like Supermole would work.”

“I can use that as a place-marker, gives him a bit of personality already. Change it later if something better comes along. Supermole writes this comic, but it gives clues as to terrorist events that haven’t happened yet. Leo figures it all out, which gives him a nice spot to shine.”

“What kind of alien will he be?” Lisa asked

“I thought it might be fun to have him be an actual gibbon. I’ve already sold the idea that Space Chimps exist, so why not?”

The sound of nylon on nylon held everyone’s attention as Libraria crossed her long legs. She dropped a huge book on the table before me. “There is some argument, but there appear to be about twenty species of gibbon alive today. Once you read this, you’ll have a better idea of what you need. Once you finish it, I have another one about the fossil record.”

Conversia leaned in until her Afro tickled my ear. “I still hold there’s great value in oral stories. They give a wonderful flavor to the history of gibbons. We can fly to the South Pacific so you can see wild gibbons, then interview the elders who live there for some of their stories.”

Wiki wrinkled her nose then turned her screen to show me a video. “Gibbons are the fastest arboreal animals in the world. Even faster than some birds as they swing tree to tree.”

“I have to use some of that. It would be kind of an adventure to add a chase scene that doesn’t involve cars. Maybe Percy here could swing after him.”

“Are you crazy, dude? I can’t keep up with that.”

“Keep it in mind. Maybe you can drive him to the Cicis for capture later on. First I need to decide how much of a role to give him.”

“I think he would be one of the good guys. Leo and I love Agent Golden Gibbon, and it would be fun to meet the creator.”

“All good ideas.” Conversia wrapped her toned arm around my shoulder. Her perfect manicure tapping over my heart. “I figure no more than six months in the jungle and you’ll have all the gibbon knowledge you need. I can use my recorder for the stories, then you can have Lisa make transcripts once we return home.”

“Look, girls. I appreciate the zest, but I only write fiction. I have to live in the real world, and they’re going to miss me at work if I leave for six months. I have to make some of this up as I go. Besides, Old What’s Her Face wouldn’t like me spending six months in a grass hut with three Sirens and a robot girl.”

“We’re harmless, mostly.” Conversia pressed her bosom into my side.

“You should still ground the story in reality,” Libraria cautioned.

“Okay, how do you feel about a trip to the Boise Zoo. Best I can do. They even have ice cream.”

A bit of progress

I got to the writing cabin late this morning. Payday finally rolled around, so I paid all the bills before the sun even came up. I also started my boiling pot to get some humidity into the air. Really helps with my sinuses this time of year.

When I walked inside the place was quiet. I found hot coffee, but Lisa Burton was nowhere to be found.

Percy the Space Chimp was prostrate on the couch in my office and playing a phone game of some kind. He wore lounge pants and a bathrobe.

“What’s going on around here?” I asked.

“Nothing as far as I can tell. I’ve been here for weeks after you abandoned me for a better story.”

“Don’t get snotty. I told you that’s how it works. And don’t say better. It’s a different story, and I hope they’re both good. Where’s Lisa?”

“She made coffee, then left. Said you were coming eventually, but blah blah, something about boots.”

“Is she still shopping with the Sirens?”

“I think they left. She said there’s a character in your alternate story with some kind of over-the-knee boots, and she thought she’d better have some for work.”

“What? That just a peripheral character. She’s kind of a slutty vampire that shows up sometimes. Lisa’s been cooped up out here for a long time. I think she just wanted to get out for a while. Let’s see if we can get some work done.”

“Finally! My story’s been stuck in the science and spy city forever, now. Let’s get this adventure rolling.”

“The city’s cool, and we’re probably going to come close to leaving, but you have a few things to deal with first. If you’re good, I’ll let you take your new transport for a spin.”

“Maybe a mock dogfight?”

“Don’t push your luck, but we’ll see. First, I’m going to saddle you with a new mission and a temporary crew member.”

“Who’s that going to be?”

“She’s someone new, and a Classic alien.”

“Noooo! Not just another chick, but a Classic to boot. You must hate me.”

“Heroes have to grow and face issues along the way.”

“Maybe I like being grouchy and prickly. Did you ever think of that?”

“I did, and you certainly are, but you’re still going to do this before going back deep into enemy territory with nothing more than a nearly unarmed ship and a transport.”

“Okay. I want to take a flight. What do I have to do?”

“Look out on the landing strip.”

Percy ran to the window. “It looks like a shrimp.”

“Why does everyone say that? It’s based upon something called a slipper lobster, and it’s manuverible as hell.”

“Sooo, I’m not hearing fast.”

“Fast enough, but not like a fighter. You’re going to have to be tricky to get away from problems.”

“I can be tricky. Let’s take her out.”

“Okay, but remember it’s a test flight. Then we’re going to tear the door off and park her in the loading bay.”

“What! Why?”

“Because that’s part of your next mission.”

“This story sounds like bullshit so far.”

“Might be, but now that war’s broken out, you have to do more covert activities. Your days in the fleet are over, but there’s a need for good pilots outside the squadrons.”

“Do your readers actually have that kind of faith in you? I mean something starts sounding cool, then we tear the hatch off and park it away somewhere. Why should they read along?”

“Most do, but some things aren’t for everyone. I’m having a great time. You’re having a good time. I’m sure Lisa’s having a good time. What’s not to like?”

“I might be able to send you a list, but I’ll play nice. Let’s take that flight.”

***

Somewhere around 2500 words today. Percy still hasn’t left the Snakeworks, but he’s pretty darned close.

How to not get anything accomplished

I wound up at the writing cabin not really knowing what I was going to do. Lisa was ready in her spacesuit, and Percy the Space Chimp seemed excited.

I opened the project, which still needs a name. A transition scene forced me to take things a little slower. We managed around 200 words.

Lisa pinched the bridge of her nose. “You’re about to have company.”

“How do you know?” Percy asked.

She pointed at herself. “Robot girl. I’m patched into the doorbell camera.” Lisa headed for the door before they could ring.

I hoped beyond reason that Lisa could get rid of them. Maybe buy me a box of Girl Scout Cookies. Didn’t work out that way.

Consultia and Libraria barged into the room. They were followed by Wiki, who peeked around her sisters and wriggled her fingers.

“Oh, no! I have a project in the works. I don’t need the Research Sirens right now.”

Consultia, a stunning black girl in a scoop-necked dress, said, “I disagree. You have two hat stories in the can, and you’re working on a space opera that could take a couple of years.”

Blonde bombshell Libraria peered over her glasses. “You need something else brewing. Your fans are going to want something unique before the space opera is ready.”

Wiki pulled out her iPad Mini, touched an app, then a huge beanbag chair in the shape of a panda head appeared. As she flopped in the seat, her red A-line bob danced seductively. “I’m ready. What are we researching?”

“That’s a cool app,” Percy said.

Wiki wrinkled her nose, then patted the chair beside her for him to sit down.

Consultia put an arm around me. Hair from her huge ’do tickled my ear. “We should talk about Detroit.” She steered me toward the couch.

“It’s just a loose idea. All the abandoned homes and businesses might be the site for an adventure.”

Libraria leaned back on the couch, then crossed her legs over my lap, leaving one stiletto heel dangling. “Characters?”

“Well, I thought I might use junior high aged kids. A boy, and a mixed race girl to explore all the buildings.”

Wiki wrinkled her nose. “It could be like Indiana Jones, and the abandoned parts are their temples.”

“I like that. I’ll need a McGuffin of some kind.”

Libraria pulled a gigantic book from thin air. “The complete history of Detroit. After you finish it, I can find you some others.”

Wiki held up her iPad. “How about this court case. This couple stole all kinds of things from the National Archives. Your kids might go looking for stuff that was never recovered.”

Percy leaned over her shoulder for a look. “That was fast.”

“Sirens are magical beings.” Wiki handed him one of her friendship bracelets.

Conversia ran a manicured nail down my chest. “We should go to Detroit to see this with our own eyes. You’ll need foils of some kind, and we can visit street gangs, druggies, and politicians. I can lead a dialog amongst you so you can get all the data you need.”

“We could explore the Detroit music scene while we’re there,” I suggested.

Libraria glared over her frames. “Wrong story.”

“Okay, but how will this be one of my stories? I don’t see science fiction, fantasy, or paranormal fitting in here.”

Consultia said, “Something will come to you. We can stay in Detroit for a few months if we need. Maybe I can get you an appointment with the Nain Rouge.”

“Who?”

Percy shot to his feet. “Wait, wait, wait! What about my story? You can’t just abandon me.”

Lisa brought in coffee and mugs for everyone. “That’s their trap. They crash an author’s career on the rocks. Craig knows this.”

Wiki frumped. “Sounds kind of mean when you say it like that.”

Lisa put a hand on her hip. “We aren’t going to Detroit, and he’s not reading that huge book. In fact, we’re going back to the space opera and letting all this stew for a few months. There’s probably a story here, but he can’t go away forever to research mindless things you might throw in his path.”

Conversia let my head bounce across her bosom, landing in her lap. “Killjoy.”

“I like you girls. I really do, but he has to stay on task. He’ll think about it. I promise.”

Libraria swiveled her legs back to the floor. “I’m sure there’s a nice champagne brunch somewhere near a quality shoe store. Are you coming?”

Lisa looked at me as she fidgeted.

“Go ahead. I’ll hang out with Percy and we’ll see what we come up with.”

“Squeee!” Lisa dashed from the room to change her clothes.

Switching stories again

Percy, the Space Chimp, leaped off the couch at the writing cabin as I entered. He regaled me with a recap of his visit to the warehouse and Ray Dongas who rules the place. He paused at the entrance to the paranormal office.

Lisa Burton, my robot PA waited inside. She wore a rain slicker and a sou’wester hat, but insisted on heels to go with them. Not so much the strawberry-blonde bombshell today as just cute.

“Wait a minute. What’s happening here?” Percy asked.

The hat atop Lisa’s head spoke. “Not your turn today, slick.”

I put a hand on Percy’s shoulder. “That’s how it works around here. Sometimes I need to give a story some time. You guys are gallivanting around the secret space city, but I need to figure out how much exploration is entertaining, and when to send you on the next leg of your adventure. Science fiction needs a bit of world building, but there’s a limit to it. This city will come back around in your tale, so I could get away with a bit more.”

“Come on, dude. I got a new shuttle I need to try out.”

“And, you will. Today isn’t the day. I need to ponder your next moves. Today is all about The Midnight Rambler.”

The hat said, “Take a break, kid. I’ve been through this a lot of times. You get used to it eventually. The Olympics are on somewhere. Maybe you can check those out.”

Lisa found a place on the couch, then crossed her legs. “What’s with all the rain in this story?”

“Couple of reasons. It’s big enough to be an obstacle to Lizzie’s success, and I have a secret plot to ruin her car.”

“She loves that car. Why would you do that to her?”

“Maybe she’s in line for a different car someday. Besides, it’s true to life. Lizzie struggles with her meaningless jobs, bills that never end, and trying to perform with her band. A paranormal tale needs some level of reality so people can relate. Then there’s the fact that some cool rain type songs have been made. Those can make it into her playlist.”

The hat spoke up. “She’s my partner, so I’m telling her. What are you going to do about her boyfriend?”

“I’m not telling you anything after that last comment. I’m still trying to make this a series of stand-alone noveloids. Anything that drifts across the titles has to be something the next book doesn’t have to explain.”

“Come on, you can tell me. I’m the hat.”

“No. I don’t think so. Success has been sparse on this caper. She can’t count on Kevin the vampire, and the Rambler is dug in to make her crazy. We’re going to initiate a few clues today that will nudge the end game forward.”

“It’s about time. She’s already crazy enough. This monster has to have an army at his disposal by now, and we’re going to have to slug our way through them to get to him. Maybe we can figure out a way to draw him out.”

“Maybe, but I don’t see it working that way. In fact, you’re going to have a little talk with her about how that last second victory only happens in the movies. Sometimes things don’t work out in the real world.”

“Well, I don’t like the sound of it. Is this going to be the Greek tragedy you’re always talking about?”

“That would be cool. Maybe I’ll give that some thought.”

The hat groaned.

Lisa took him off and placed him on the end table. “Relax. He’s already told you about his plan for a new car. If everyone dies, there’s no need for that.”

“Maybe, just the boyfriend dies. That could work.” The hat wobbled to look at my reaction.

“What do you think of this song?”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“That reminds me. I need to see what kind of help disaster areas really offer. Lizzie can’t work anywhere except where her band plays. The diner’s flooded and landscaping is at a standstill. Even her basement apartment has water inside.”

“Does this mean the Research Sirens are coming back here?” Lisa asked.

“Could happen.”

Writing Saturday

I looked up from my iPad after the day’s work was finished. “3000 words, not too shabby.”

Percy the Space Chimp poured another cup of Huloran tea. “I don’t know, dude. You spent an awful lot of time playing dress up Barbies.”

“I’m worried about it, too. Think of it this way, the Cicis are identical. Having two-dozen of them wandering around the resort was bound to draw attention. I had some dress up, and some dress down. They visited hair salons and such to differentiate themselves from their sisters.”

“Lotta words dedicated to that, and why the rest of us?”

“I have to think on the trilogy level. I have words at my disposal, and there could be a plant and payoff type lesson in there somewhere. Disguise might come back with a huge upgrade. As far as the rest of you, Leo was wearing cast away stuff that belonged to you and the Cicis after you burned all his clothes in an earlier section.”

“There was nothing wrong with my shirt.”

“Nothing at all, if you’re a Space Chimp, but Leo isn’t. None of it fit right.”

“Plopping us in a resort city to go shopping doesn’t feel like a space opera.”

“You know why you were there, and it wasn’t shopping. You have the spy photos, the good guys want them, and that’s where they wanted to meet.”

“Why did Buffer wind up with Lisa’s vest thingie?”

Lisa stood and twirled. “Cute, huh?” Her vest extended into skirts alongside her thighs, and long tails in back. The buttons around her waist enhanced her figure.

“That’s how it works sometimes. Lisa has a great outfit, and I wrote it into the story. It might move in the wind or action scenes like a superhero outfit.” I turned to her. “This tea is wonderful.”

“Science Fiction Amazon seems to have everything. I can get you a six-pack of lightsabers if you like.”

“No. That was someone else’s story.”

Percy snorted. “At the end of the day, we didn’t sell our photos, and we didn’t get paid. It’s another wild goose chase.”

“True, but now you’re going to the secret scientific spy city.”

“That sounds more promising.”

“Hope so. I was going to call it the Skunk Works, but that’s a real place. Rat Works seems to have been adopted by a company. What do you think of the Snake Works?”

“Does it really matter?”

“Yes. I want it to be a city readers will remember. A place to explore and dwell on. I have some cool new characters at that location.”

“Great… even more to share page time with. And what’s with me ping-ponging between paranoia and trust lately?”

“It’s the life of a spy. You’re paranoid about everything, but Buffer is helping you see that trust is part of the mix, too. Both have their uses in this line of work. I need to come up with a name for the guy who runs the place. He’s going to be helpful to your career. Then I finally get to use Ray Dongas.”

“What’s his deal?”

“I decided the story needs one of my batshit crazy characters. I was reading about Radon Gas one day and the name just came to me.”

“What’s his deal?”

“He runs the warehouse district at The Snakeworks. Okay, it’s more like he rules it like a minor kingdom. He’s going to be, let’s call it colorful. He’s got to be some kind of alien, and might be a good guy to make friends with.”

“You haven’t let me make many friends, so far.”

“You’re a little bit prickly, sweetie,” Lisa said. “Maybe this is one of those times to trust. Trust your author.”

Percy pushed his cup away. “Got anything stronger?”

“There’s some WhistlePig Rye in the kitchen.”

“Guess I’ll have to trust that, too.” He made air quotes around the word.

Lisa got up to fetch the whiskey. “You know, Craig, you’re going to have a Ray in this series, but you’ve also written a Ray into the hat series. Are you worried about that?”

“Crap! I hadn’t thought about that.”

“Ha haha!” Percy pointed at me. “Looks like it’s your turn to be paranoid, dude.”

“Better bring a glass for me, too.”

***

I still need to come up with a new post for my next Story Empire slot. I’m not coming up with much. All I have now is something about the interpreter character, so that’s pretty thin. There are a few weeks left, so I might come up with something this weekend. Hope all of you are getting to do whatever you like for a couple of days.

It’s a flex day

I folded up my iPad, then stared across my desk at the writing cabin.

Percy the Space Chimp lay on the couch. “Dude? Why’d you stop?”

“I think I’m done for the day.”

“Come on. Last time we knocked it out of the park.”

“Not all days are like that.”

“You didn’t even get a whole chapter written.”

“Nope. Twelve-hundred words approximately. These transitions are getting tougher. Your ship moves around the galaxy, and the crew can do fun things while travelling, but I have to keep them fun. I’ve already explored the ship and explained some things, like science fiction has a habit of doing. I can’t keep explaining it.”

“I like the action bits better.”

“You would, but these are the sections that make fans love you. You and Leo had a big victory in the early parts.”

“Yeah, but the ladies punished us for it.”

“Don’t you think that makes sense?”

Lisa Burton, my robot assistant arrived wearing a silver bodysuit. She placed out some tea. “I noticed you logged off.”

“What are you wearing?” I asked.

“You’re into science fiction right now. Maybe robot girls wear this in space. I noticed you were writing about tea, so I brought you some. I don’t have Huloran tea, like in your book, but this can substitute. I’ll check the science fiction version of Amazon to see if I can get the real thing for your next session.”

Percy slid over to make room. “Leo and I downloaded some magazines and stuff, and now your author friend thinks we should be punished for it.”

“It isn’t the content, it’s the way you went about it. Things like spacewalks are dangerous and you didn’t share your plan with the others. I don’t know what you’re whining about. I kept getting tazed or magnetized in my stories. Besides, the girls gave you your precious comic books eventually.”

I sampled the tea, then leaned back in my chair. “I know the next half-dozen big events that are going to happen. Getting between the places takes more thought the way I work. Eventually, Leo is going to piece together a mystery you didn’t even know was there.”

“Why Leo? I mean, the dude’s a good friend, but I’m the one here helping you.”

“Because you’ve kind of become the main character. Leo needs a win, and it helps his character grow. I need to let the others shine a bit, too. Auburn fixed up that robot and he proved helpful. The Cici’s helped with those gangsters, and their hive mind is fun to write. I still need something big for Buffer. She hasn’t done much since she killed that guy back on Denmouth.”

“That was an accident. I’ll testify to that.”

“Relax. She has some abilities I haven’t explored yet, and deserves some sections devoted to her. Right now she’s kind of a broken toy.”

“Aren’t we all?”

“Yeah, but that’s the point. You come together in a kind of pseudo-family. I’d like to dwell on Buffer for a few days before you land the ship again. If this is going to reach trilogy length, you’re probably going to have to help me for a couple of years.”

Lisa leaned forward. “I think we should talk about your robots. I mean, they all look like robots.”

“Yeah, shouldn’t they?”

She pointed to herself. “Hello!”

“No. This isn’t a story about you trying to fit in. Besides, there’s no way I can get you out there without breaking all the canon of the stories you’ve already been in. I’m sure we’ll have you pose for some promotional posters and send you on a tour eventually.”

“What about the Hat stories? I could pop back into one of those.”

Percy sloshed his tea. “Don’t remind him. He’ll jump projects again, and where does that leave me?”

“You need to calm down, or I’ll give you a case of mange in the next chapter.”

“It’s just frustrating. That’s all.”

“Low word count frustrates me, too. After all these years, I’ve come to accept it.”

***

That was my flex day. I appreciate those banner days when they happen, but they’re the exception. Today didn’t amount to much, but I moved the story along.

Time to Speculate

I landed my gyrocopter at the writing cabin mid morning. Something felt off, but I had a decent idea to toy with.

Lisa Burton, the robot girl handed me a mug of coffee, as she took my hat and coat. “Percy’s waiting in your main office.

I looked at her nebula print skirt and how it hugged her curves. “You look ready for space today.”

“That’s where you left off last time. If I have to change for the Hat story, let me know.”

“You’re good. I want to go back and plant some things in my story. Just enough to lodge in the readers’ minds.”

Percy, the Space Chimp waited on the couch. “What are we working on today?”

“Not sure. I’m at a place I’ve never been before. Both stories are log-jammed in my mind somehow. I’m going to back up and add some data to your story. Maybe it will inspire me to move it forward.”

“What are you adding?”

“We already have Classic aliens. The kind everyone thinks of with big eyes, bulbous heads, etcetera. I’m going to give them a form of telepathy.”

“That’s been done, dude.”

“True, but my Classics are annoying. They invade people’s minds, they go on illegal adventure tourism, and most of my galactic inhabitants hate them.”

“I hate them.”

“Plays right into my hand. You’re the one that feels discrimination everywhere. Sometimes, when it doesn’t exist. It’s because you’re a genetically engineered species. When you discriminate in turn, it gives me a chance to teach you a lesson.”

“That’s bullshit, dude. I’m supposed to be the hero here. You know, heroic?”

“You still need some kind of character arc. Besides, it’s a team adventure. Maybe someone else can be the focus for a few chapters.”

“I doubt it. Don’t see anyone else here today.”

Lisa walked in and flopped down beside Percy. “I can remedy that. My database is full of contacts. I have everything from a talking yak to a devil lady called Mustang Sally.”

“What are you doing?” I asked her.

“Please. I monitored your typing speed, and you aren’t hitting any word count records today. Talk to us, maybe it will help.”

“Okay. The Midnight Rambler has taken refuge, and is building a fortress. His plan is to make Lizzie and the hat come to him. To fight on his turf, so he can kill the hat.”

“Sounds great,” Percy said. “What’s the problem?”

“Lizzie can’t just wait around until I send her into the big fight. She needs to be a little more proactive. I’ve expanded her world to a degree, and readers seem to love that, but the main story needs a bit more.”

“How did you expand it?”

Lisa leaned forward with a business card. “Castor and Pollux, Attorney’s at Law. Makes for a great side story with the attorney’s from the supernatural world, but I can see what he means. Side stories are great, but the main event needs to stack up properly.”

“I set the whole story during a major flood. We’re talking tornado sirens, rain, thunder, flooded buildings, the works. I can’t use Kevin as her street informant, because he lives in a culvert. He has to be missing somehow. I can bring him back in the future, but Lizzie needs something else this time.”

“Get rid of the flood,” Percy suggested.

“I can’t. I want Lizzie’s band to play a set of rain and flood songs.”

“That’s just stupid.”

“Now you get the point. The Hat stories are supposed to be corny. One day someone is going to leave me a review that reads, ‘This is the stupidest story I ever read, and I absolutely loved it.’ Sometimes people just need an escape from every day life, and a chuckle along the way.”

“Frenemies,” Lisa said.

“I don’t get it?”

“Back in Mrs. Molony, you introduced a female vampire that hunted the special events. You could bring her back to fill Kevin’s role for one story.”

“Oh yeah, short, stacked, flirty. She was a redhead.”

“Maybe you could have some fun with the frenemies concept.”

Percy slapped his hands together. “Great, we’re all stupid and funny now. What about my story? Why do the Classics have to be so creepy. Seems to me if they’re telepaths, there’s no reason for us to sneak about and do spy things?”

“Ah, you’ve reached that point. Someone who likes speculative fiction has to suspend disbelief in varying degrees.”

“I get that. I’m a space chimp genetically created from a dish-full of human and ape DNA. People have to believe that.”

“Nope. This is the deeper version. Why didn’t the eagles just fly the ring directly to Mordor? Indiana Jones had no influence on the story about the lost arc. It’s like time travel. Once you introduce it, there’s always the question about why someone didn’t travel backward or forward to fix everything.”

“Why don’t the cops ever show up? Why can’t Stormtroopers hit anything with their lasers?” Lisa added.

“Then why keep writing at all?”

“Because people who like speculative stories will go with the flow. Authors learn to add limitations and it helps make things more realistic. Your Classics have to be close to make it work. Maybe even invade personal space. That’s another reason why people shun them.”

“Okay, we completed half our spy mission and we’re floating around in the void. Let’s fire up the engines and do the next part.”

“I don’t want the second half to be like the first. You might complete the quest, but it has to pose a whole bunch of new problems.”

“And you don’t know what those are. Figures. I should have held out for a better author.”

“I know what they are, but it’s kind of like building a puzzle. Things have to fit together the right way. Thirty-eight thousand words in, readers will have already seen space travel. They know how the ship works. I can’t get any more mileage from that while you trek across deep space.”

“So we just float there until you figure things out. Meanwhile, you’re planning on bringing a vampire to the cabin? Lisa doesn’t have blood, so I have a little problem with that.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time one came here,” Lisa added. “Relax, Uber eats comes if I call them. We can order some dumplings or something, and she can snack on the driver. If I tip them well, they seem to keep quiet. She leaves them with a huge smile on their faces.”

“We didn’t get anything done.” Percy slumped back into the couch.

“I don’t see it that way. Sometimes thinking and talking things out is more important than word count. Besides, I got this long blog post out of the deal.”

Return to the Writing Cabin

I got an early start today, and flew to the writing cabin in the dark. It’s been snowing like crazy in Idaho, but we have a lull today. It’s the first of six days off I have, and intend to make the pixels fly.

Snow covered the landing strip, but I managed without too much of a problem.

Lisa my robotic assistant met me at the back door. “Glad you made it. What are we working on today?”

“I looked at her ‘Lizzie and the Pythons’ tee shirt. “Cute, but it looks like you already know.”

“I knew you’ve been dabbling from home, and took a WAG.”

“Good guess. Let’s get started.”

“There are some people in your paranormal office.”

I wound my way inside to find a chimpanzee in a space suit, sitting beside a man whose head had been replaced by a flaming jack o’ lantern.

The pumpkin guy wore a black tuxedo. “I know I’m going to finish my part today, but I could wear other outfits, maybe cover some different roles in the story.”

“Make sure Lisa has your contact information. I may need a cop with a pumpkin head later on. Can you change your head out? It should look a little different.”

“They can do it down at the union hall. Thanks for your consideration.”

The chimp spoke up. “What about me, dude. You’ve left us floating in the yellow zone for a month.”

“That’s not completely true. You passed through the yellow zone and are floating in enemy territory. You guys were always a side project for when I run into rough patches. The Midnight Rambler will hit one, then I’ll move you to your spy project.”

“When might that be?”

“I have a nice stretch of writing time. Might be in the next few days. Besides, you’re earmarked for a trilogy, so chew on that.”

“Lucky monkey,” the pumpkin head said.

“Don’t call me a monkey. I’m a Space Chimp. An ape, not a monkey.”

“Calm down. I need to finish up with him today, then Lisa can cashier him and send him home.”

“And then it’s back to the space opera?”

“Maybe. I have a couple of gods I need to work with. Twins from the Gemini constellation.”

“I’ll see your twins and raise you twenty-six identical clone chicks.”

“How did I get stuck with you, anyway. The Cicis are hot.”

“All Humans seem to feel that way, but I couldn’t care less. I think it’s because I’m becoming the main character right now.”

“Be a good… Chimp, and let me work on Midnight Rambler. I need three complimentary titles for your trilogy. Work on that. I’m thinking of ones that read, ‘Of X andY,’ where the variables change per volume in the series.”

“Fine.”

“And can you do it in the other office? This is where paranormal stuff happens.” I settled in to work, and it turned into a banner day. It came to around six-thousand words on Midnight Rambler.

It’s kind of dialog heavy, but The Hat books always seem that way. Still, there was some good stuff happening. Lizzie might have found a boyfriend, we drove a magical car, and a major storm event is keeping her from any real success. Then there was a major shootout at Eat The Worm, one of the Pythons’ main venues.

Lizzie’s boyfriend needs life sustaining drugs, and the only person who can make them is missing. Boyfriend is on a clock now, and the storm isn’t helping.

That’s where I decided to call it a day. I picked up the Space Chimp and we walked into the lobby.

Lisa counted out cash for the pumpkin head. “I love your tux.”

“Thanks, your author gave it to me. I love your tee.”

“I had to steal it. I’m not in this story, but one of my old calendars is.”

“Do you get a residual for that?”

Lisa glared at me. “Doesn’t look that way.”

“Bummer. If you need me again, just call.”

The extra left, then Lisa turned to us. “What happens next?”

“I’m going home. This is Percy, and you can hang out with him.”

“He’s been here a week. I know his name. We finished the originals, do you want to start on the remake Planet of the Apes movies?”

“Eh, why not. Gives us something to do while the mighty author plays with his paranormal stories.”

I’ll make you some popcorn.”

***

That was my day. We’ve had so many leftovers from Christmas, but we’re finally getting down to the end. Turns out goat cheese dip makes for a fair lunch, and chocolate eggnog is good in coffee. I’ll take up the keyboard tomorrow, but Percy is likely to be disappointed for a few more days.

When plans go awry

I had my bachelor Saturday all planned out. I wanted to pick a few more peaches to eat fresh, then keep hacking my way through Lanternfish.

When I went into the back yard, Lorelei, the Muse, greeted me. She wore a pair of white shorts with an apron. That’s it aside from her sneakers. “About time you got started.”

“What are you doing here? I’m planning on editing today.”

“Yes. That’s all nice, but it’s creativity that fuels me. I want to work on your side project.” She stood on tip toes to reach the high-growing fruit.

I was inspired already. Lorelei is built like an Olympic diver, and her bronzed back glistened in the sun. “That has to take a back burner. I have two books to edit.”

“Oh, psssh! You’ll get them done. You should still dedicates some time to your science fiction project.” She handed me a peach, then went for another one.

And that’s where Saturday ended, folks. I had such a cool idea for my side project that I had to scrap most of the outline and start a new idea sheet. This was supposed to be character driven and fun. I suppose it still can be, but now it’s going to have a deeper plot. It might take me months to work this all out.

Part of this is because I’m thinking of a trilogy once more. Lanternfish was work, but perhaps if I start that way from the beginning, then don’t try publishing until it’s finished, it will be more fun.

So, what is a man, left to his own devices, supposed to do after all that? He does this.

Take few peaches fresh from the tree.

A little simmer in some simple syrup. Then pit and chunk them up.

Add a slug of insurance.

Don’t forget the other main ingredient.

Toss everything in the blender with ice, and don’t forget a nice tiki mug.

Okay, it’s wonderful, but would have been prettier with white rum. I used what I had on stock, and have my supper all ready. It’s health food, I swear.

I should find something to binge watch. Maybe some science fiction to keep my flow going.