I got to the writing cabin late today. I have family responsibilities on Sundays, and won't shirk those. I went into my office and started on all the things a writer has to keep up with.
I answered several emails, checked Twitter and Facebook, then proceeded to WordPress. Lisa* brought me some coffee, and I looked away from the computer. “Guess who just won a Planetary Award?”
“I don't know, who?”
“Me. My short story, Something in the Water, won a Planetary Award over at Planetary Defense Command.”
“Oh.”
“I thought you'd be more excited. I'm excited.”
“It would have been nice to have Bombshell Squad win something.”
“I get your point, but Something in the Water was a fun story, and it caught the judge's attention. Besides, you've been getting plenty of attention. Wild Concept sold some copies during its 99¢ sale, and the UK sale is still going on. They may even surpass the US store.”
“I suppose. It's just that you've grown as a writer. Bombshell Squad is a little better writing than Wild Concept.”
“I don't get your point. Something in the Water is just as recent, and reflects the same amount of growth as a writer.”
“Should we celebrate, or something?”
“I think we should. We'll get the enchanted beer horns filled up and drink them dry. Make sure you post a picture of the haunted biplane on the blog too. People may want it for a phone background, or even a computer. Besides, you're in the picture, and some people might like that too.”
“That's a good idea. I love my flight jacket.” Her eyelashes fluttered, and I knew she was online.
Lisa scowled. “I have some bad news too. It looks like someone held a kegger out at the island. They defaced the Moai with spray paint and left garbage everywhere.”
“That sucks, why do people have to act like that?”
“Don't know. Do you want me to take a sandblaster out there and try to clean it up?”
“No. Today we celebrate. Drop a note to the National Park Service fairies. They'll take care of it.”
“You're not going to make those poor fairies scrub those giant statues, are you?”
“It's kind of their job, but no. They use dermestid beetles.”
Lisa's eyelashes fluttered again as she searched the Internet. “Gross, those are the kind of beetles scientists use to strip bones clean.”
“Right, they use them for museum displays. I think even the cops use them to study the bones of murder victims. The fairies keep a large herd of them, because they eat garbage and even spray paint.”
<Snort>
“What?”
“Do the fairies use tiny little dehorning saws and branding irons?”
“I have no idea. I'll bet they have an informational page on their website. You should check it out.”
“I'm going to, and if they don't I'm going to shoot them an email.”
“For right now, let's celebrate.” I whistled for the enchanted beer horns, and they both trumpeted. Lisa filled them up while they wagged their tails and helped us celebrate. Lisa doesn't need to eat or drink, so I'll probably empty both of them myself.
*Lisa is my robotic personal assistant, and the spokesmodel for my books. She even has her own Facebook Page.
Congratulations Craig and bad luck about the statues. I hope the snails alright under all that!
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I think he moved on.
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PS a TV programme that takes a comedic look at news stories mentioned this website – http://www.everythingfarm.com/accounts/wkjorg/
naturally I thought of you 🙂
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That’s awesome.
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I should explain that the news item was that a guy woke up one morning and discovered he’d bought a yak in his sleep!
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As one does from time to time.
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I found it. Perhaps you can add it to your ideas mill ha ha! http://metro.co.uk/2016/04/13/man-accidentally-buys-a-cow-off-the-internet-while-on-sleeping-pills-5814120/
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Congrats on your award. I would be celebrating for sure!
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Thank you.
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Congrats again. What does an enchanted beer horn do that a regular one doesn’t do?
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Runs around on it’s tiny legs, and rubs on my leg. They also sound off every afternoon about 4:00 like a pair of wild tubas.
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Interesting. Though I’d worry about them spitting out the beer if they’re full during sound off.
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This was fun. I miss the snail but am not complaining. Congrats again.
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I think the snail crawled into the sunset.
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Okay. I can take it.
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Yaaay! Love those beer horns, they’re so cute! I want some. Congrats, it’s a great story! 😊
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Thanks again. The first one was to drive some people to the Commander. This one was for me.
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And why not! 😊
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First off, I love the images you’re doing on your blogs!! Each one is different and adds to the whole. It’s pretty impressive!! Second, I wish I had a writing cabin!! Lol. I would spend a LOT of time there. And kudos to Lisa for taking care of you. Have a good night!! Take care!!
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Thanks Traci. I wish I had some actual artistic talent, but I’m having fun with the header image. Who knows, if I do a bunch of this, maybe some latent talent will show up.
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Awesome news Craig!
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Thank you Janey.
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Congrats!
How weird and interesting about the beetles…
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That’s how they strip skeletons for museums and such. They are a real thing.
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Yes, I Googled. It’s weird and interesting 🙂
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Love these stories from the cabin. Congrats again. 🙂
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Thank you.
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By the way, I thought about you when I included dermestid beetles. Seemed like something that could be cool in a murder mystery.
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Ooh, you’re right. They would be cool. Adds that creep factor. Love it.
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HUGE congratulations! The enchanted beer horns got me!
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Thank you. The beer horns have been on the blog a few times. I think I’ll order some artwork with them included.
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Please do! I’d love to see how you imagine them!
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Congrats! You are so creative! Those dermestid beetles read pretty scary. A robotic personal assistant? And who has a spokesmodel for their books? Damn! I wish I’d thought of it––so creative. 😉
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I like to try things other authors are not. Lisa has gained a loyal following, and it draws attention to my work. I agree that dermestids could be twisted into something terrible.
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It’s a brilliant idea. That’s how you think outside the box.
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Well, congratulations to you, and gross on the beetles! Something in the Water is a really cool story. I’m glad it won! 🙂
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Thanks. Glad to see you around again.
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