Somebody stop me!

Today is my rotating day off. I got to the writing cabin early this morning. Lisa* had the coffee on, and a fire in my office fireplace. She had on her racing jacket, a short skirt, and heels.

I fired up my computer, and started re-reading my last chapter. I start every writing session this way. It was time for the good guys to recover the mcguffin.

But first… I ought to check WordPress. My service was sporadic, annoyingly so. It was almost like a sine wave of service. Catch it on the peak, and pages loaded – catch it in the valley, and everything stalled. It was so annoying, I started writing.

Lisa went about her chores and left me in peace.

Lisa loves the Will O' the Wisp

I must be past the dreaded middle. I started off with a trip across the city to recover the mcguffin. Once those characters recovered it, I changed to another character.

This character learned about mojo hands, dumped a gun barrel in the Mississippi, and went after the mcguffin himself.

When they met up it devolved into fisticuffs. Well, one punch, but the fist was the size of a milk jug.

Things got a little strange trying to stay in one perspective. I had to use *** breaks to explain what each character was doing as they got to their automobiles.

I wrote my first car chase scene. It was kind of short, but sometimes I think Hollywood carries things too far. At some point the police would show up.

Lisa came to check on me. “Are you about ready for a break?”

“Not right now, I’m on a roll.” I turned back to my writing.

She refreshed my cold coffee and left.

There were a couple of near misses in the car chase, then I destroyed one of the cars. A character died. A dog got scared. (Hey, he’s a character too.)

“I think the beer horns are about ready for beer time,” Lisa said.

“Not now, I need to get this idea down. I’ll be done in a minute.”

I got my survivors to the hospital. “Lisa! I need you to put on a suit and read some lines.” I heard her thunder upstairs.

She returned in her brown suit. “Ready. What am I this time.”

“An attorney.” I handed her my iPad. “Read this.”

She repeated the lines.

“No, no, no. That’s too cheerful. Try to be a little more forceful, bitchier even.”

She tried once more, and postured during the forceful points.

“Better, I need to change it.” I went back to writing.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You seem a little bit crazy today.”

I managed a maniacal laugh, and kept typing. My antihero spent some time in a roadside cafe, and managed to put two and two together. He’s been working for the bad guy all along. This isn’t going to end well for someone.

Lisa rattled around in the hallway. “Go on in there. You guys can be a little bit early today.” The enchanted beer horns ran into my office blasting their baritone notes in my ears.

“Wait, I need my heroine to feel bad now. She has to take responsibility for what happened.”

Lisa held up a growler of nice brown ale. “Look, beer. Mmmm. You like beer.”

“Yeah but.”

“Don’t you have Rafflecopter prizes to deliver?”

“But emotions. My heroine has to feel bad.”

She filled the horns with beer. “Oooh! It’s so cold and frothy. I’ll bet it’s good too.”

“But the internet sucks right now.”

“Okay, I’ll boost your signal. Come on, you can feed your plants some sardines. You always like it when they snap thing up.”

I picked up one of the beers and drank deeply. “Okay. I guess I can stop for the day. I managed 6500 words, and could have gotten more.”

“I know you could, but you’re getting weird. It’s time to walk away for the day.”

*Lisa is the main character in Wild Concept. She’s a robot and helps me around the writing cabin these days.