Bad Writer, but with Chorizos

I slept in this morning. Five thirty may sound doubtful, but when you regularly get up a four AM it’s a godsend.

I headed for the writing cabin and intended to make a ton of headway.

Lisa* came over the radio, “The runway sucks. It’s frozen right now, but when you land, keep going. Park on the road. You’ll have to use it to take off again.”

“Roger that. I have some serious writing planned today,” I said.

I put the little gyrocopter down as lightly as I could, but it was really bumpy. The snow was removed and piled off to the sides of the runway.

Lisa said, “The coast is clear. I’ll unlock the front door. There’s just a few of those prehistoric stagmoose running around out there. They look pretty strange with velvet nubs instead of antlers. No saber toothed cats or anything to worry about.”

I stomped my feet and went inside. “Make a note. We need to order some gravel for the runway.”

“Got it,” Lisa said. She had on her Elvira dress again, and held Bunny, her pet rabbit, over the interesting parts. Her strawberry blonde hair was down and slightly over her shoulders.

I went into my paranormal writing office and hung my hat on the stone gargoyle. The alchemy artwork display bubbled merrily. Doubt** was still asleep in the gigantic hippo head.

I went right to work and immediately stopped. I hadn’t written any new fiction in about two weeks. I backed up and read the last three chapters. I only stopped long enough to change the occasional typo. You know, “hose” that should have been “house”.

I use a lot of plants and payoffs in my stories. This is the time to manuver all of it into place. I had to pause a few times to get everything right. I paced around the office, and let the Will ‘O the Wisp loose again. It careened off the bone chandalier and off the wall.

I looked out the enchanted window, and Godzilla was stomping through Las Vegas. I don’t have any control over what it shows, but it was a good scene.

The kids in my story needed a car, and I had to figure out how they could get permission without telling their parents what they were really up to. My main character, Patty, had to do some more library research. This time it payed off, she’s going on the attack. It’s kind of fun writing a story where the characters don’t have smart phones, Google, or texting. You have to think about how it all used to work, and make it seem realistic.

I moved my characters into position. They’re about to get slammed hard, but for now they ripped on each other and scared each other. It’s all fun and light hearted, and then someone bleeds, dies, or gets hurt.

Doubt started croaking away. Kaw kaw kaw.

“Hush you,” I said. “You’re no help when I’m on a first draft. You’re more useful when I’m editing.”

I made a few period references to make sure readers were still in the early 70s with me. Then I paced some more. I opened the enchanted window, and looked outside. Lisa was taking the skiis off my gyrocopter. The stagmoose were crossing the meadow, and they did look funny this time of year.

The Will ‘O the Wisp careened off the sill, and ricocheted toward the fireplace. I quickly shut the window. I didn’t want it floating across the meadow. I didn’t know if Lisa could catch it again, and I wasn’t even going to try.

I went back to work and typed like a madman. Doubt kept calling and I probably should have listened to him, but I forged ahead.

I heard Lisa come back in, and she spoke to someone. It sounded like Lorelei***.

“How bad is it?” Lorelei asked.

“It could be alright, but he’s been at it a long time,” Lisa said. “I hate to see him need a huge rewrite.”

“I’ll go talk to him. You make food, that always distracts him.”

Lorelei came in and sauntered to the couch. She wore a baggy sweater with some yoga pants and her Nikes. She turned slowly, so I could appreciate her yoga pants. “So how’s it going today?”

“I’m making up for lost time. I might be able to make up all the words I didn’t get last week, and still put out a decent word count for today. You were right, Friday is my day.”

She patted the couch beside her.

“No time, I need to keep this momentum. Where’s Lisa with my coffee?”

“I have her doing something else. Talk to me. I think you’ve about done enough today.”

I wandered over to the couch and sat beside her. “Does it suck or something?”

“No, but Doubt is trying to tell you it’s getting close. You may have to delete some crappy sections.”

“That happens,” I tried to stand up, but she put a hand on my neck, and pulled my head against her shoulder.

“Calm down. Rome wasn’t built in a day. The story is working, but you’re getting too excited. Look, here’s Lisa with your lunch.”

“Chorizos and eggs, one of your favorites,” Lisa said. This time her Elvira dress left little to the imagination; split up to there with her tattooed leg sticking out, split down to there with almost everything else sticking out. Her heels clacked across the stone floor.

I thought, Couple of nice views, if nothing else goes right today. I said, “I love that, I haven’t had chorizos for a long time.”

“So simple,” Lorelei said.

“I made notes,” Lisa said.

“I could wash all this down with a nice beer,” I said.

“More notes,” Lorelei added.

“Definately,” Lisa said. She headed for the refrigerator and the beer horns.

I wound up at 61,101 words. That’s 3945 new words today.

* Lisa is my assistant. She a robot, and the main character in Wild Concept. It’s a fun read, you should check it out.

** Doubt is a raven, kind of. He was a gift from my Muse, and is supposed to teach me things.

*** Lorelei is my Muse.

11 Comments

Filed under Muse, Writing

11 responses to “Bad Writer, but with Chorizos

  1. Awesome! I’m about to write now. :).

    Like

  2. So, quick question here, but also a potential blog prompt if you want to make something longer of the answer.

    I’ve heard you mention plants and payoffs more than once. What are you talking about exactly? I’m sure I could google it, but I’m much more interested in asking you directly.

    No pressure. 😛

    Like

  3. I hope the words are all good. Nice going. Sounds like you had a productive morning. 🙂 and chorizo….. Mmm Mmm!

    Cheers

    MTM

    Like

    • You know, I think that’s why I was forced to stop. There is bound to be some crap in there somewhere. I’m nearing the end, and my word count always climbs then. I always start strong, bog down in the middle, and accelerate toward the finish line. I hope my middles don’t read like slogging through deep snow.

      Like

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